Timeout in a Ghost Town

Twitter96433f8_jpgI sit and write with trembling hands, racing heart, and a disquieted mind. Anxiety has stolen my peace, so I’ve come here to my safe place balancing caffeine, nicotine, and a nip of bourbon; hoping to find my grounding.

I will spare you the details of the madness picking up and whipping around me in gale force winds. Instead I want to try an exercise that was discussed in the Writing 101 course I’m enrolled in (which I’ve horribly neglected due to life). The general overview of this practice is to have a coffee break and engage in discussion.

I hope you don’t mind if I smoke as well, but it is a calming practice.

As I’ve become more serious about my writing, I have been considering creating an author persona. What I mean is I have been mulling over the creation of an author-specific social media presence. Facebook, Google Plus, etc. profiles for professional presence and development.

I’m holding back because I think it might be jumping the gun. Trying to get published and being published are two completely different realms of existence. At what point do you present yourself as professional writer ready to take on the world?

Even still, I also think my approach may be wrong. Perhaps instead of presenting myself as an author I should be presenting myself as a poet. It is much more honest, but is it a thing? Is there a milestone that must be reached before you proclaim yourself for what you are inside?

I am a poet. I write poetry. It is what I do. It is what I know. It’s saving my life.

Much of my uncertainty is reinforced with my research into poetry societies, groups, and publishers. It encourages my fears that I am a fake, fraud, phony because I am not where these amazing artist are.

I hope that my work speaks for me; that it is enough to vindicate what I’m doing here. Still, that fear.

I’d love to hear from you, dear reader. Are you there? Are you finding your way there? What are your experiences? Insights? Wisdoms? I don’t have many answers, but they’re out there – most likely among many of you.

Well, I’m feeling a little more grounded than I had when I started this. Thanks for letting me bend your ear.

Until next time,

deep breaths.

About St Basil Z Fish

Curator of the strange and incredibly awkward. A rambling writer with the misguided notion he has something to say. His only redeeming qualities are his wife and children.
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4 Responses to Timeout in a Ghost Town

  1. mrsreckless says:

    I know nothing about being a professional and I don’t know where there is – which probably means I’m somewhere very far from it. I love writing, but I’m scared to call myself a writer. I feel like I’m too young, too inexperienced and not good enough to have that privilege. But on the other hand, who’s gonna believe in me if I don’t? All those amazing artists had to start somewhere too, right? Maybe the fear never goes away. Maybe the only answer is to keep going against it…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Z. says:

      “…who’s gonna believe in me if I don’t? All those amazing artists had to start somewhere too, right?…”

      There is so much right with that statement. Thank you.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Julia Byers says:

    You are a poet. Even if you did not label yourself that, I’d think of you that way, because what you share is poetry. Not just any poems, either, they’re haunting and beautiful and (I at least) can feel the pain and the hope and the longing within the words. I think that if you do that, despite whether your words have made it through some publication considered a rite of passage or not, you’re a poet.

    As far as creating your online presence as a writer or a poet, it comes to my mind kind of like employment. It seems more likely that an employer will contact you if they kind find information about you on the web, and how well it’s presented. Thinking about hearing all the marketing and such both trad-pubbed and indie-pubbed authors need to worry about, I can only imagine that having your own space set up and interactions with fans, *waves*, would be a positive thing for a publisher to see.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Z. says:


      Your words are so incredibly kind. Thank you.

      I appreciate your perspective greatly. Your thoughts regarding online presence especially have left me with much to chew on and consider.

      Again, thank you so much for your thoughts and perspective. They have been incredibly helpful!



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